Thursday, July 21, 2011

A half-musing:

If we're all here for a reason,
Then, oh, what treason
That the plant is rooted
And the vine, muted.

Monday, September 20, 2010

Skinny Jean Guilt

I just bought--and wore out in public--my first pair of skinny jeans. And I felt pretty good about it; so good, I'll probably wear them again tomorrow.

I'm not sure how I feel about this. Does anybody else REALLY remember skinny jeans? There were visible socks, there was acid wash, there were pre-made rips--and we do one of those three to our 13-inch ankle widths already.

I was flipping through next month's ELLE (I very rarely do, it's all ads, but I won't pass up a $4 subscription to very many magazines) and there, on this non-ad page, were two models dressed in outfits reminiscient of the some-month 1987 issue of Seventeen I have somewhere around here, with the blurb, "Chloe's western prep collection is so 1985--and we're crazy for it!" I am NOT. What happened to mocking 80s dress?

I have a theory: the fashion designers nowadays are kids of teens and 20-, 30-somethings of the 80s. They got their parents' hand-me-downs; flipped through old photos of their parents' parties. Everything's a throwback and, personally, I hope I'm not too old to wear 30" flares when they come back around.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Solving the Financial Crisis

If we all only use the banks for paying bills, withdraw all other monies and use cash to buy material things (i.e. clothes, meals, gadgets, etc.), it would help. Cash suddenly stopped being used over the last decade, and it needs to get back into circulation.

It's too bad people couldn't just be trusted; we wouldn't even need banks.

Monday, March 22, 2010

As a country, we're only as strong as our weakest citizen; in order to strengthen the general population, we must first strengthen the weakest.

Healthcare to all, and to all a goodnight!

Monday, December 14, 2009

[Do leaves go to heaven too?]

Do leaves go to heaven too?
With their deaths in -ray orange,
-Beam yellow and red-like-fire;
To dry up, crinkle in brown;

They say we die, blast of light
Before our eyes, nirvana
Finally reached like no high.
To all the falls before me:

We shall one day meet again.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

The Placebo Effect

I am observing The Placebo Effect on myself.

My wisdom teeth have been giving me a lot of grief, top and bottom, on the right side of my mouth. Five days ago, I went to the dentist to get a referral to an oral surgeon so I can get these suckers out of there, and he prescribed me Lodine 400 for the pain. Prior to my appointment, I was either loading up on ibuprofen or taking Vicodin where I could find it; the pain was unbearable, making it extremely difficult to concentrate on my work or my commute, and at the beginning, when I wasn't taking anything for the pain, I would cry.

They say that believing something will help, no matter what the help is for, puts The Placebo Effect into action. I haven't taken a pain pill since last night (about 16 hours), while they recommend one every 8 hours. Before you think, "Maybe the pain has just subsided", I don't see how that would be possible, due to the fact that my wisdom teeth are still in there, still impacted, still shifting. I am surprised that The Placebo Effect seems to be affecting me, while the Effect has been on my mind since 16 hours ago... We will see.

My mother is going in for an MRI today to learn that she is (hopefully, only) in Stage 1 breast cancer. She will have a double masectomy as a sort of preventative measure, rather than just a lumpectomy. (Her ex-sister-in-law had a lumpectomy, only to have the cancer return a couple years later.) She asked me to pray for her, citing "studies" (quoted because I do not know of any myself, and she did not provide me with any) that show people who pray and are prayed for generally do better (in this case, in health). I attribute this to The Placebo Effect as well.

The brain is a very powerful muscle. People can knowingly take sugar pills in place of pain, antidepressant, anxiety, etc. pills, and still obtain the same effects as the test subjects who took the real deal (in more than 30% of cases). By simply saying "I believe", knowing that something will and should work, will convince your brain of it.

When she asked me to pray for her, my mother made a good point when she said, "You could be wrong." Yes, I could be, and I will never claim to be an atheist until there is concrete proof of anything I now consider to be abstract. In fact, I would rather just be and not identify with any sort of denomination or otherwise; however, for the sake of argument, I would call myself agnostic. I do not know what is in store for me, nor anybody else, beyond this world; nobody does, and nobody should be claiming to know absolute truth when the only thing that is absolute in this world is Time.

With that said, I am still finding it very difficult to even approach prayer. If my mother's cancer has spread beyond her breasts, putting her in Stage 2 or more, it is there right now, two hours before her MRI. If she is past Stage 1, praying won't put it back to Stage 1. I tried religion; oh, believe me, I tried. As I grew (and as adults in the Church looked down on this child for asking too many questions, which I considered to be logical), the faith that was instilled in me since the beginning of CCD diminished. The effects of peer pressure waned, and my impressionable mind developed into a logically thinking one which questioned everything it had been prevoiusly told. I read the Bible, parts of it more than once, and while I will agree that it is an interesting story, my mind can't believe that it is anything more than just that: a story. Along with the Qu'ran, the Upanishads, Greek mythology, etc., they're all on the same level of Beowulf: a tale which has been passed on through the ages.

I do hope that, in a millenium, there aren't people wandering this Earth looking for Jack's beanstalk, a passage to the skies.

Keep my mother in your thoughts today.
EDIT: she's in Stage 1; double masectomy on the 20th.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Brand New...Again

I've rediscovered Brand New, my favorite band in high school, and it's making me super happy.

"You're just jealous cuz we're young and in love."